saying goodbye

When I was getting ready to leave college after my freshman year, all it took to make me cry was someone saying, “I can’t believe it’s over.” This year it takes even less to make my eyes start tearing and for me to get weepy. I’m only a junior, so I probably don’t have the excuse to be upset, I still get to come back to Bloomington in the fall and have another great year of college. I don’t have to say good-bye to my discipleship girls, or my pledge class, but I do have to say good-bye to a majority of the first Christian community I’ve ever had.

I came to IU very lost. I didn’t know who I was, or what I wanted out of life. By God’s grace and after a couple wrong turns, I ended up involved with CRU and starting a personal relationship with Jesus. Somehow, God landed me into an already established community of people who loved each other and opened their arms to me… well, I may have had to sneak my way in there a little bit, but they were welcoming. It has been in this community, over the past three years of college that I’ve learned about grace. We’ve fought, we’ve cried, we’ve pulled pranks, we’ve stayed up way too late, we’ve eaten a lot of ice cream, but we’ve done it together. It is through these people that God has shown me Himself and truly loved me. I’ve had men who have been the big brothers I never had and taught me that I’m worth being pursued and that I’m worthy. I’ve had women who have shown me that being a woman of God doesn’t mean I have knit or be boring – I’m simply called to be the best me I can be. These friends have believed in me when I haven’t even been able to believe in myself and never let me settle for less than what they knew God desired for me. Over the past three years I’ve made a lot of mistakes, but because of the way that God has used this community, I’ve been able to ask for forgiveness, receive prayer and move on a stronger person.

I’m incredibly excited to watch my friends move on to the next stage of their lives, I’m sad I can’t come with them, but this is how it was supposed to be; this is how God planned it. We may never live in the same city all together ever again, but I’m so thankful for the past three years with all of them… I can’t imagine my college experience without them. Everything I believed about Christians when I came to college has been radically altered because of the community I’ve been able to experience. God knew I wouldn’t have survived losing a grandparent, changing my major 5 times, being a leader, emotional dependence and an eating disorder without best friends to pray for me, pick me up off my feet and point me back to Him every step of the way.